Well here we are at the Bristol Marriott Hotel for the British Boarding Schools Conference. I have been doing some reflection on the three way relationship needed in a boarding school environment. Our first speaker was Libby Purvis a reporter who unlike most reporters is very pro-boarding. Let's start with her opening quote:
"If there is one thing crucial to making boarding work in a modern and emotionally literate society, it is the creation of a three-way partnership between the pupil, the parents, and the staff. Trust, openness, patience and goodwill are the key words: and the adults naturally bear the greatest responsibility for keeping it real." Libby Purvis
I think this statement is fundamentally true, boarding schools in the modern age musn't be content with being good we have to be great! Why, I hear you ask? It comes down to the fact that most prospective parents don't initially approve of boarding. These parents feel it is unnatural to send their son away to prep school, most have no experience of boarding themselves or in some cases had bad experiences when they boarded. In most professions good enough is good enough but in boarding schools you have to be better than good, you have to be great. The only excuse for boarding is when it is done exceptionally well. This is something we have to keep in the forefront of our minds at Huntley. Whatever we do for boarding has to be of an exceptional level being good is not good enough we must be great.
Done exceptionally boarding schools give a network of relationships for students to take up and explore independently. For most boys it is their first opportunity to grow, make decisions and test themselves in a safe environment. When done well this development in confidence and self awareness is the first thing parents notice about their sons. Boarding schools provide belonging, loyalty, and comradeship. But if it goes wrong or is not done well it can be terrible.
To be a great boarding school we must mesh with modern family life. At Huntley I believe we should be seen by parents as an extension of family. The school in essence is almost like a friendly uncle, not trying to intrude on the family but be a friendly, supportive addition to shaping their sons for the adventure of life. Staff must give huge support and listen and try to understand parents. Parents also have a role to play in supporting their son but equally supporting the staff in this equation. Parents and staff need to realise that boarders share everything, favourite teacher, same best friends, best subject, sports teams, play etc. parents are the only thing they don't share. Therefore boys will ring them about every grievance. This is not necessarily a bad thing but parents do need to realise this and temper it with the fact that they will at times get a jaundiced point of view from their son. They must therefore build good relationships with staff and trust that what their child is telling them is not necessarily the whole story. The Head plays a integral role in assuring these relationships develop well. If it is done well the boarding head will find his job easier. It is largely about trust. Staff and parents must agree never to undermine each other.
I guess one of my challenges as Headmaster is communicating this to all three groups.
I hope the term has started well. Warm regards from rainy Bristol. Brad
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
No comments:
Post a Comment